434: I want to feel like myself again

In this week's podcast, we’re answering a question from a listener who feels she’s lost herself to anxiety and just wants to feel like her old self again.

Discussion Points from this episode:

When anxiety takes over our mind, it pulls our attention to what we feel we lack or have lost.

One healing practice that’s helpful when we feel this way is to write down in a journal all of the sweetness that remains in us. The good parts of us that anxiety hasn’t eclipsed.

Take an inventory of the courage, humour, compassion etc. that is all still there in you .

Note the things you can still do.

And the ways you still show up for your loved ones.

How asking questions helps:

Get curious about your feelings by asking open-ended, supportive questions, exploring your feelings will help you get to the root of why you don’t feel like yourself, and what you might do to feel better.

Explore questions like:

What specifically are you not feeling that you miss?

What does it mean to feel more like you?

How can you help yourself build that feeling again?

In all trauma, anxiety and suffering lies the opportunity for growth. If anxiety is pulling our mind to go over what we feel we are missing, we can lose that opportunity.

Ask yourself what you can do now, in this moment, to take a step toward how you want to feel.

Perhaps a walk outside, or listening to some of your favourite music. You might want to reach out to an old friend to share some laughs about old times.

Anxiety will tell us otherwise, but we really do get to choose how we feel. We might need some support, or gather some inspiration, but we can choose.

Getting beyond a victim mindset

”Don’t ask why me? Ask what now?” Dr Edith Eger

One of the tricks of anxiety is to lock us into a victim mindset where we fixate on everything we don’t want. We might resent or hate our anxiety. We might fear we’re missing out on life and feel unhappy about that. But all that energy of resentment and resistance lives inside us. It’s harmful to us and adds to our suffering.

Instead, we can ask “How do I want to feel?” And start taking steps today to find what you want to feel.

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